Do you remember when we were dating and I would always ask, “Are you good? Are you OK?” I think you finally just punched me to get me to shut up. Or kissed me. Either one would’ve done the trick. I used to make you so irritated when I would ask that, because, of course, you were perfectly capable of telling me whenever something wasn’t right.
It was just part of the learning process. I would do something stupid, you would look at me to say, “You’re an idiot,” and we’d both laugh and move on. But, there was something more going on than the surface tit-for-tat. We were learning what worked and what didn’t.
I realized that my entire goal was to make you happy, but it wasn’t in a way that meant giving you everything. It was in a way that would point you back to the love of God for His child. While I don’t get a lot of things right, I do know how to point people back to the Father. I think that’s what makes me different – sets me apart from many others. The waiting, the watching, and the preparation all lead me back to one thing: God has gifted me, so that I can gift back to Him through you.
I think this started when I was really young. I would watch my dad take care of my mom. She was fully capable of taking care of herself, but it was a delight to see how they meshed together to work as one. It wasn’t “her” job to feed us and care for us. In fact, my father actually liked feeding us when we were too small to take care of ourselves. I see it now as he cares for his new children.
He ended up doing dishes, rather than watching a ballgame on TV. If mom was working, dad was working just as hard to take care of the house, the yard, and to provide for the family. Again, this is not to say that she is incapable, but rather to bring to light that their relationship was a two-way street.
I desired that same relationship, one that would allow me to care for my wife and give back to her. It really brings to light the words of Jesus as He said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Sure, we all want things, but those things seem to matter less as we learn that giving takes their place.
A friend made the following statement to encapsulate how I feel about serving you:
“Bryan, your desire is to love someone so deeply, so intimately, that God has placed that desire in your heart for a long time now. I don’t think you could date someone like you. It seems that you have to find someone that is so different, not because it makes you hardcore, but because you are the only person who could ever show them the love of God through what He has given you.”
And, it’s not one-sided. You have given me so much more than you could ever comprehend. My hope – my desire – is that neither of us is left feeling empty, because everything that we do points us back to the love of Christ.
Chapter 1 :: Chapter 2 :: Chapter 3 :: Chapter 4 :: Chapter 5 :: Chapter 6
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